Monday, January 21, 2008

Eishkom Load-Shedding

Viva! Amandla! Mshini Wami Mshini Wami....... Awulethe uMshini Wami!! Long live black power! Long live Darkness! Finally we are becoming a black nation. We can be proud that we can begin living as proud Africans, not colonialist pawns. Except I hear the Chinese have moved into Zimbabwe in a big way. But they can make our leaders rich, so long as we can live like Africans. What would we do with those resources anyway? We are born warriors. Lets hope we can get a good fight going here, like the bloodbath promised if they take Msholozi to court. We love Msholozi so much, the way he ignores all the white man's laws, does what the hell he wants to enrich himself and gets away with it! Really strong and ruthless. A true African leader who we are proud of. Now lets rape and steal from the remaining colonialists. Strength is the new law! Men will again take control!

Why do people hate 4x4 drivers?

No, its not global warming, as any 4x4 driver will immediately tell you. Its easy for them to keep their heads in the sand in that respect. Its because they're idiots. And hypocrits. Speak to any one and you'll see what I mean. My friend got an email from one after he joined an anti 4x4 facebook group. He said that he got his SUV not just to be a poser, but because he needed to pull his horsecart, and because he needed luxury. Mostly they'll say they need it to drive offroad on some trip that never happens, or happens once in their lifetime, and they have to make an effort to find somewhere where the 4x4 function is needed, since even in africa there are very few places a sensible person needs it. In fact, if you do, you're probably destroying some small animals home. Which brings me to one of the main attractions. Invincibility. 4x4's can drive over lots of things and bump lots of things without any risk to the driver. I had the front of my car smashed by a 4x4 in a parking lot, and know of many others who had similar. This means you can drive like an idiot without risk. Now that's bound to make you unpopular, but if you don't care, what does it say about you? I know of another 4x4 driver who drove his overpowered, excessively fast 3 ton behemoth into the back of a row of stationary traffic in the fast lane on the highway. He was upset because some "idiot" caused his 4x4 to be written off, and he had to find a lift home. How bothersome. He said he didn't even bother to brake. The insurance gave him a new one. He never mentioned the carnage or how many people died in the car in front. Not that he bothered to check. 4x4's are major obstacles and block the view of other drivers on the road, stretch right across a parking space and damage the car next door when opening their gigantic doors, destroy the environment and kill animals by driving offroad, drive much to fast and endanger other road users, can't stay in their lanes because they're too big and can't see, drive into dogs and cats, small people, parked cars because they can't see them. Basically they're irrational modes of transport, and only a narcissistic jerk would be prepared to have one. You have to think that you are the most important thing in the world, and need to be specially looked after, and are more responsible and clever than everyone else, to buy one. Which makes you what?

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

4x4 Heaven

As the proud owner of a new 4x4 SUV, I can now say, from an insiders point of view, that this kind of vehicle is most likely to contain an arrogant jerk. A lot is said about testosterone, feeling bigger and better than everyone else, attracting the hottest women, etc. So I suppose that people who need more of all that apparently get it with this kind of car. I can't say its worked for me, but then I didn't consider myself lacking in those departments previously. I can say for sure, that these cars are a complete waste of money and are road hazards for their drivers and all other road users. I've personally watched as a housewif reversed her 4x4 into (luckily) another one, before parking, seemingly oblivious to the damage inflicted. My old car had its bonnet folded by a 4x4 behemoth, who most likely literally felt nothing before driving away. Often they block the view for other road users, and I find myself driving to the left, just to allow the car behind to see whats going on ahead. The road holding is appalling compared to any car. The vehicle is difficult to keep in its lane, because its so wide, and difficult to maneuver and park. People in cars hate you parking next to them, since your huge doors cause quite significant damage to their cars when you get out, especially since you had to squeeze your behemoth into the parking place in the first place. Yes, there's no doubt, you feel like a jerk in a 4x4.